The mask of Ive Got It All Together is one of the most popular masks that we tend to wear.

Its so easy to put this mask on, and then forget you are wearing it. We want to look to the outside world as if everything is fine, weve got it all handled, no problems, thank you very much.

This one weighs a lot, and is very heavy to carry around. Even worse, it makes it very hard to ask for help.

Putting this one on

The only reason for putting on the IGIAT (I've Got It All Together) mask is in a misguided attempt to deal with our own insecurity.

Some people raise this to the level of perfectionism and are mortified at any little crack in the image.

Putting this mask on others

Another way this mask shows up in our lives is when we put it on someone else. Someone may appear to us as if they have it all together so we label them that way.

Believe me, 25 years of working with people's struggles tells me that every one of us struggles in some way, many times hurting in the same places as everyone else.

Alternatives to the mask

Take a chance and take it off. Take it all off. The mask, that is. Many times, demonstrating to others that we are human can be quite endearing. Perfectionist tend to push people away.

I'm not suggesting being careless or irresponsible. I am encouraging being a real live human being, warts and all.