Im so bored with my life, confided a casual acquaintance few days ago. Materially, Ive got everything. But, he continued in spite of it all, my life is empty. As a guidance counselor Ive heard similar statements of sigh and groan again and again. In spite of it all, this world is filled with unhappy occupants. Both the rich and the poor, both the educated and the less educated, both the popular and the less popular, are victims of this same malady: unhappiness. Is there any way that I can be happy with my life? My acquaintance finally asked. Learn the Value of Contentment In the course of our conversation, Ive suggested five ways to happiness. First of all, Ive said, you need to learn the value of contentment. Whether poor or rich, I continued, you need to appreciate life and value the blessings that often come in simple and little packages. Many people, in spite of their wealth, popularity, and influence, are unhappy because of discontent. These people are never satisfied with what they have achieved. They are always on the move. They are always looking for another territory to discover, another venture to manage, and another adventure to experience. Life is always at the blazing trail. One of the ways to be happy is to find contentment is what life offers and to value even the simple things of life. Take time to smell the aroma of a budding rose petal, hear the sweet melody of a hummingbird, see the blue sky, and feel the warm embrace of a loved one. Benjamin Franklin understood the importance of contentment when he succinctly wrote, Content makes poor men rich; discontent makes rich people poor. Make Others Happy The second way to happiness, as I continued my conversation with an acquaintance, is to make others happy. Happiness is like a boomerang; it has a way of coming back to the sender. Charles Dickens famous story about a character named Ebenezer Scrooge is a wonderful illustration of this principle. In spite of his means, Scrooge was grouchy and unkind especially in his treatment of Bob Cratchit, his clerk. It was only after he had received a visit from the Ghost of Christmas Past that Scrooge began to realize the evil of his actions and decided to change for the better. Finally, a smile could be seen in his face. Count Your Blessings Instead of Your failures Happiness is a perspective. People who often find themselves languishing in their failures are some of the most miserable people upon the face of the earth. Day after day, these people continue to recite their failures. Instead of focusing and counting their blessings they focus and count their failures. As human beings, constrained with limitations and inadequacies, failures are inevitable. In spite of them, however, we can change our perspective in life. We can focus on our blessings. Instead of dreading our failures we can use them as learning curves that will propel us to a higher and noble path. Forgive Yourself of Your Failures Forgive yourself of your failures is another way to happiness. Past is past. Crying over spilled milk will not help much except to cause swollen eye bags and ruffled eye lashes. To be happy, one needs to forgive oneself of failures. Horace Bushnell wrote, Forgiveness is mans deepest need and highest achievement. Forgiveness breaks the chains that hold a man to his past and sets him free to live a life of fulfillment in the present, and creates a path of opportunity that will bring him more blessings in the future. Seize the Moment This principle reminds me of the story of a young soldier who was travelling with his commanding officer. As they boarded a train, they found themselves sitting in front of a young lady who was also travelling with her grandma. From the start it was apparent that the young soldier and the young lady were experiencing love at first sight. As a result, a conversation ensued between the two. When the train entered a tunnel, the train cabin became pitch black. Then the sound of a kiss was heard, followed by a smack on the face. The young lady thought to herself and said, "I am glad that he kissed me; but I wished that my grandma did not have to slap him" The grandma thought to herself and said, "I cannot believe that the young soldier kissed my grand daughter; but I am glad that she gave him the slap that he deserves." The commanding officer thought to himself and said, "I don't blame the young soldier for kissing the young lady; I only wished that she did not make a mistake of slapping me instead of him." As the train went out of the tunnel, there was a big smile on the face of the young soldier. Why? Because he had managed to kiss the young lady while slapping his commanding officer at the same time. This young soldier knew how to seize the moment. He did not allow the opportunity to pass through his fingers. He planned his course of action, and he acted on his plan. Many people are tragically unhappy because they have allowed precious opportunities to slip through their fingers. At the end of the day they sigh and moan because of lost blessings. How to be happy? Here are five important principles: * Learn the value of contentment * Make others happy * Count your blessings instead of your failures * Forgive yourself * Seize the moment. |
